05.30.09
Megga Bitch
So I recently took this Facebook quiz and I scored ‘Megga Bitch’ on it. The description was: “you chew people up and spit out the pieces you dont like!!.” Which is true, to a certain extent. Which is what leads to the fulcrum of this post..
I am a selfish, manipulative bitch. Part of me is, at least. ‘Someone’ and I even came to the mutual conclusion that we are both like Greek Gods observing mortals and their scandals on earth. I have, essentially, manipulated Sister into not talking to Someone and now she is involved with TWO of Someone’s friends. The plan is working flawlessly; however, there is always room for error. He called her again to try to be friends– she told me this and I essentially broke the happy bubbly and said it was a ploy. Which it is.. to .. some extent. I FEEL LIKE A HORRIBLE PERSON which is why when bad things happen to me, it feels like Karma. In all honesty, though, you cannot <i<make something happen if it doesn’t want to happen.. so it’s not ALL my fault.
In other news. Someone is gone, the Saga is essentially over but I could not even begin to recap the last few months which have felt more like Seasons on a reality television show than anything else. And I’m the executive producer who makes elusive cameos.
When not being a Megga Bitch, I moonlight as a nice, lonely, miserably single Ivy League grad itching to begin the next chapter in her life. While all of my friends are engaged or married, I have few local friends and spend my time working out and being a productive member of society. Today, as it does on so many days when I interact with large groups, I face the very hardening reality that: I am single and no one else is. There was “Beach” party in my condo building today and all of the residents were hanging out.. all of them with friends.. or their significant others.. neither of which I had. So, when I decided to leave, I came upstairs and cried on the phone to my Mom who couldn’t really talk. X is going to the movies with his mother and couldn’t talk so here I am. Again.
I suppose I could use this time to NOT be selfish and continue tinkering away at my epic to-do list.
kitakinz said,
May 30, 2009 at 4:39 pm
Hey Megga Bitch,
You may find that your not as cruel and manipulative as the facebook quiz says you are. You sound like a someone with a right mind.
Selfishness is never a way to go, even I have my moments.
But I find this article piece that you’ve written very FUNNY
I shared it with some people and they felt sympathy and thought this was pure comedy at it’s best.
You write well when you have problems. It happens. Let life go on and don’t forget to write about.
Pillowchats said,
June 1, 2009 at 10:01 pm
Hey -
First of all, the fact that you admit you are a megga bitch probably means you are not. The real ones are the ones who pretend to be nice, end up stabbing you in the back, and you wouldn’t even know what happened!
Second, life is not always pleasant. But, what I realized (maybe with age) is that it’s ok to be alone. Sometimes, I prefer to be alone. I wouldn’t have to deal with anyone else’s issue but my own. And, as you grow older, you become more comfortable in your own skin; so much that you can dine alone, and not be embarrassed about it. I feel like once I have been able to do that, I didn’t care for what other people thought.
P.S. I don’t remember who told me this but someone’s mother, single, would always dine (alone) at this restaurant. Then one day, a gentleman approached her, and told her that he always noticed she dine alone and asked if he could join her. They apparently have been dating for a long time now (no intention to get married as both have been widowed or divorced).
So keep that chin up high